Yesterday Once More-I’m Getting Old.com

Seriously, the last 2 years have been pretty good. Been hanging out with the blue-eyed man, and he’s a good cook. And he likes to eat like a normal person, read-cereal for dinner is a rarity.

And a great glass of wine each evening during the at-home cocktail hour is de rigeur too!

What does that mean?

Errr-what is the result?

I tried on my black leather mini-skirt (ok I wear it with black tights and boots-so not so racy!) – and no way it was gonna zip closed!

Some things in your closet are not gonna lie!

That knit dress-well you can suck it in and wear control top pantyhose-but

something with no stretch, well

it aint’ going anywhere except the goodwill bag.

Sigh.

Now I know, I was feeling a bit chunky in the last so many months, when I quit Diet Pepsi, I lost weight for awhile, and bright idea I had, I started drinking Naked’s Blueberry juice.

Feeling oh so virtuous and healthy for once, I wearing my at home work uniform of Alpine shorts and gray t-shirt(s), did not notice that the lbs from the diet pepsi diet were coming back to visit!

Duh! The juice has boku calories! It’s been so long since I focused on calories and carbs and fats and stuff that I had to shake myself awake.

After being a bad-ass exerciser for many years since I quit smoking-7 days a weeks, 2-3 hours a day, no rest, well

I try to tell myself I was waiting until I got to the point which I call the 0-60.

60 meaning-going full-tilt and exercising like crazy, where doing anything more brings only small incremental results.

0 meaning-night after night of cheese and wine, doing my beloved ballet class-that has the happy (un?) result that ANY amount of effort will have a result.

I digress.

I am acutely aware of my body and gaining a few pounds just brings it in to sharp focus the toll the last 2 years have had.

When I first looked in the bf’s standing mirror-I thought, damn, I’m skinny. Now I angle the mirror this way and that to make me look skinny!

Adding injury to insult, when I read the yelp comments for Hclub, the obviously young set talk about the lack of eye candy, and the fact that everyone is over 50!

When I used to read in magazines about the fact that after a certain age, women lose their appeal and become invisible to men.

I have become invisible.

In some ways, that’s a relief.

I was always the shy person who didn’t want people to look at me, unless I was performing on stage, or at least on the stage of the exercise floor in a fury of high-kicking aerobics or kick box.

I was a bad-ass.

Now I’m a flab-ass.

Oh well. I’m a happy flab-ass.

At the end of the day, I am blessed to be extraordinarily healthy without a cloud in the sky.

While my peers are struck with health challenges that are pretty serious.

It makes me realize the amount of love and caring I have for my friends and family.

So I say a little prayer.

And jiggle on down the road.

k